It was not bother me at all, but all of a sudden, the answers just pop up:
What I've been consistent for the past 7 years?
1. I still trust him, up to today. After what he has done to me
2. I haven't given up on our marriage.
I am so surprise, the answer is very negative.
1. ...if you had trust
me... we wouldn't have resulted to this,... in the past you had lack the
motivation to understand me and my beliefs and friends...
2. Have not given up on
marriage on paper, does not mean they are still mentally together with
each other. There are many couples stay together because of paper or
stay married,... but already lived separately or giving up on each other
under one roof...
Now, is it some kind of "pride" and fear of been looked down... for this reason of staying together?
Now, is it some kind of "security" for the reason of staying together?
Now, is it "other" reasons for staying together because...?
I want you to be true
to yourself. I also tell myself that as well... AND my belief and
practice that I been sharing with you because it gave me confidence and
courage to face this world. It taught
me how to extend my care beyond my comfort zone at times. When I can
live for others, and created positive changes to them, it made me
happier. Also at times, I also need my private space to live for myself
too, so I can rejuvenate.
Be patient, TRY to see with your "open" mind,
listen with your "open" heart, think with "open and caring" mind. Feel
what your heart and mind is telling you.
Keep in mind, now is only talk and exchanges, when the actual event comes... you still have to run the marathon on your own.
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